{"id":3811,"date":"2013-10-02T08:12:27","date_gmt":"2013-10-02T14:12:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/?p=3811"},"modified":"2013-10-02T08:12:27","modified_gmt":"2013-10-02T14:12:27","slug":"haunting-memories-blood-and-stitches","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/2013\/10\/02\/haunting-memories-blood-and-stitches\/","title":{"rendered":"Haunting memories, blood and stitches"},"content":{"rendered":"

There I stood, facing my mighty foe! Muscle failure was happening all over my body. I could barely take a step forward, barely throw a jab. My limbs were like lead, but I knew I had to keep going. She looked tired, too. I was cramping up. No! Not that feeling! Horror bloomed in my heart like a poisonous flower. The fight was almost over. I hadn\u2019t won yet. Why does my body fail me so? I hate my body. I knew I had to\u2026.<\/p>\n

\u201cOne more take-down. Can you give me one more take-down, Roxy?\u201d Miesha Tate said earnestly, her eyes locking mine.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes!\u201d I breathed. “One more take down.” <\/p>\n

I might still win.<\/p>\n

I forced my failing body into motion, slamming into my opponent. Pain burst through my temple. She braced herself. I cried out with effort, scooping legs and landing heavily on top of her. <\/p>\n

She was down! I did it! <\/p>\n

I rose up to do ground and pound, and I felt warm wetness slide down my face. Blood started dripping steadily onto my glove, onto the ground. I paused\u2026..<\/p>\n

Actually, I was just sparring with Heather. When I shot for my take down, my face slammed into her boney hip, cutting open my temple.<\/p>\n

\u2026\u2026.okay, I don\u2019t know about my other fellow fighters\u2026.but extreme moments in fights I\u2019ve lost come back to me in flashes. They are like mental and emotional scars. They hurt for a while, and bleed when they\u2019re fresh. Then they scab over and mostly go away, leaving a trace of what they once were. <\/p>\n

I was joking about the \u2018foe\u2019 thing, but in sparring, when I felt my muscles get tired from overuse, it reminds me of a few times in my recent fights, especially in TUF. It feels like only yesterday. The loss hurts so much, but it\u2019s motivation to train hard so I\u2019ll never get that feeling again. The fact that I lost in the way I did infuriates me. I swear right here and now, I\u2019ll never lose to the powerbomb again, and I\u2019ll never be gassed again. <\/p>\n

\"miesha<\/a><\/p>\n

(pic copyright ZUFFA\/Fox Sports)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There I stood, facing my mighty foe! Muscle failure was happening all over my body. I could barely take a step forward, barely throw a jab. My limbs were like lead, but I knew I had to keep going. She looked tired, too. I was cramping up. No! Not that feeling! Horror bloomed in my…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-3811","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized","category-1","description-off"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3811","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3811"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3811\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3811"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3811"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/roxannemodafferi.net\/RBlog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3811"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}