hard but amazing week, and TUF 26 ep 9

This past week was hard because I started to catch a cold the previous Friday. I managed to rest and recover so I didn’t get a fever or anything, but I felt so drained and exhausted all of last week.

I still trained, of course, because I wasn’t in the contagious stage anymore. I had many great practices. I improved my jiujitsu with my private lessons with Captain. Man, I always feel like I level up after training with him. Did mittwork with John, always improving all aspects of my game. I feel so confident. Serena helped me with a shark tank with him in the cage, which is intensive training including striking, grappling, cage-work, and ground and pound. Serena helps me so much in training! I’m really appreciative. Lorenzo has helped me get stronger and get in great shape. I love him!

Last week my second fight aired on The Ultimate Fighter! I did an interview with the Las Vegas Review Journal with Heidi found here:
https://www.reviewjournal.com/sports/mma-ufc/roxanne-modafferi-previews-tuf-26-fight-against-emily-whitmire-video/
and then FOX sports flew me to Los Angeles to be on TUF talk! I did shark tank in the morning and hurried to the airport after that. I was so exhausted from training, plus my body finishing up killing my cold, but I think it was good for me to be on the show. It was such a cool experience!


A professional make-up artist did my make up…. I told her “natural.”



I had a dressing room with a star next to my name, next to Karyn Bryant! I got to talk to Daniel Cormier! I got to show off my Spiderman socks and explain my collection on national tv. hahaha!

The episode had my fight, Sarj vs DeAnna, and then what happened with the weight cut. Everyone was asking me what I thought of Lauren’s actions. Man, Lauren is taking a lot of heat right now. I kind of feel bad for her.
Yes, I think it was okay that she and like 5 other people started cutting weight. Yes, I think she should have vacated the sauna earlier when Sarj asked her to. BUT she apologized later. People make mistakes. All you can do is apologize for them, right? Lauren REALLY tried so hard to be cool with everybody, fighters on both teams, and the coaches, too. She was always polite when talking to people. She never exploded angrily and cussed anybody out, except when Eddie called her the wrong name. She wanted to win so badly! She wanted to fight so badly!
I also understand Sarj’s perspective, too. It’s upsetting to have someone trying to vie for your spot and opportunity, and she did have one more hour.

Unfortunately, there was only one sauna. AND only one scale.

Guys, it’s so rough to be in the TUF House. It’s a pressure cooker and there is no escape. You literally can not leave. You have no emotional support unless you made close friends while on the show. Someone on Twitter once said that my TUF blogs sounded negative, and what was wrong?

It’s REALLY HARD and not exactly pleasant to be locked away with no freedom, having to do exactly what the staff tell you to do, without your team, etc. I wanted my team, my gym, Taco Bell, my anime, my friends, everything. At least I had my pillow! Actually, this experiences wasn’t that bad for ME. The staff were really polite and bent over backwards to do what they could to make us comfortable and happy within the limits of their power. I’m really grateful for all their efforts.

I never like calling fights. When someone asks me who I think will win, I never really am convinced anyone will win. Anyone can beat anyone at any given time! Even if you analyze their skills and strengths. I fought Jessica Rakoczy on Season 18 She was 1-2 as a pro MMA fighter and beat me, and I was like 15-9 or something, I forget.

I know who I WANT to win. I really liked Sarj but I knew DeAnna personally from before so I wanted her to advance. I always just tell the questioners that my friend will win. lol I was so shocked at that head kick KO! It was…stunning. I thought Sarj was a boxer. Whelp, I guess she can kick, too! Damn! Well, I kind of didn’t want to fight DeAnna again because I had already fought her and won, but on the other hand I thought I would win again so that would be good…but I didn’t want her to LOSE to Sarj, which would be what would have to happen for us to NOT fight again.

That was a long sentence. Did you get that? lol

There were actually two fights that day. I had gone first, so I got to watch the second one from off to the side in the corner near the doctor check area.

About my fight, I knew Emily had skills. I thought I probably had more since I’d been training for longer. She also only fought at 115, so I figured I wouldn’t get out-muscled. I can’t say I thought I’d be stronger, because physical strength is not one of my strengths. (is that… a pun? not sure. moving on…)

When I got out there….man, I missed Coach John’s voice in my ear telling me what good combinations to throw.

He is the gamer. I am his character. He shouts it, I throw it. We are connected. It’s really cool. This time, I just kind of did my striking by instinct… for better or for worse! I did hear Luke Caudillo (on Team Gaethje) who gave pretty good advice which I followed. Of course when playing any video game, you gotta get used to the controls. He did a great job for a fighter he’d only been training for three weeks. I heard Vinny’s voice perfectly, and he did a fantastic job of jiujitsu cornering. I’m so grateful to them. I think I would have gone nuts if I hadn’t met Luke, who holds pads and coaches similar to John. He also took the time to give me reassuring talks. So grateful.


Maia was always by my side during weight cut, and helping me warm up before my fight. Thank you, my friend! I miss you! <3
Anyway, I had never actually trained with Emily ONCE because she hurt her rib right as I was getting back to training after my first fight. She probably saw me doing my spinning backfist stuff while she was training elsewhere. I complimented her on her ducking under it and shooting later, and she said, “I saw you thinking about it.” That’s kind of a cool statement.

No, that was not the Roxynado. I gotta be more careful in the future that people don’t read my super attacks.

One interviewer asked me if I felt her giving up in the fight. Um, no? I wasn’t really trying to sense her feelings. I was just trying to hit her as much as I could so the ref would stop the fight. People online are saying I suddenly am “vicious” or have a “new killer instinct.” I don’t really think so… I just know how to throw ground and pound better thanks to Coach John. It was one week after my fight against Mariana Morais in Invicta, where I was hitting her and hitting her and Big John McCarthy WOULD NOT STOP THE FIGHT. He whispered to me in the corner walking by, “You’re not hitting hard enough.” So I said to Coach John later, “Please teach me how to ground and pound better so the ref stops the fight so I don’t have to keep hitting her” And oh he did.

Once in the cage, I’m switched on. I’m no longer kind “Roxy,” I’m “Warrior” in The Happy Warrior, who has struggled, sweat, cried, bled, and bore the pain to get where she is now, to win, to prove herself. I feel no emotions in the cage until time is up.


I’m glad I won. I was just so relieved.

oh btw what was with not showing my weigh in clothes? Maia did my make up, and I wore her black dress which was SUPER tight because it was two sizes too small for me….. and I pretended like I didn’t wanna take it off. It had a zipper down the front. I am shy so it was hard for me, but that was my ‘weigh in dress up’ deal I did. Oh well….

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